Consider the following passage:

"And Benjamin made a covenant with Sarah because he loved her as himself. Benjamin took off the robe he was wearing and gave it to Sarah, along with his tunic, and even his sword, his bow and his belt."

What is the relationship between the two individuals? Is it platonic? Consider the fact that Benjamin disrobes for Sarah. Also, what exactly is meant by the word "sword"?

Done, kiddos?

That passage is actually from the bible, 1 Samuel 18:3-4. And it does not describe the relationship between Benjamin and Sarah (names I chose at random), however, it describes the intimate relationship between David and Jonathan. Here is the passage as it is written in the bible:

"And Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself. Jonathan took off the robe he was wearing and gave it to David, along with his tunic, and even his sword, his bow and his belt."

Many scholars and laymen alike claim that the relationship between David and Jonathan was very intimate, but platonic. This assumption may be (in part) due to the "hetero-normative" society we live in. As such, it is difficult for heterosexual people to entertain the idea of a homosexual relationship between the two men. It is therefore a useful exercise for heterosexual people to replace one of the men's names with a female name, and see what impression they get about the relationship between the two characters.

Something else to consider:

2 Samuel 1:26, David says:

"I grieve for you, Jonathan my brother; you were very dear to me. Your love for me was wonderful, more wonderful than that of a woman."

Homosexuality in the bible? You decide.

Love, one fiesty midwesterner.

P.S. Feedback is welcome & desired. Hatred is not. Also, visit my last post and keep sending your bible passages my way! :)

Every year, English teachers from across the country submit their collections of actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays. These excerpts are published each year to the amusement of teachers across the country.

Here are last year's winners.....

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse, without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli, and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.